road trip day 7: greenville

Greenville College: Hogue Hall

Driving from St. Louis to Greenville was full of memories.  It’s amazing how much comes back simply driving around old stomping grounds.  We passed Pocahontas, home of the Powhatan restaurant, birthplace of stale coffee and awesome ooey-gooey’s – mounded ice cream over a massive brownie, topped with whipped cream and chocolate syrup of some sort.  Pokey, as it was known, is a truck stop, and oddly enough, a hotspot for college students.  There wasn’t much to do in Greenville.

A bit of trivia:  country singer Gretchen Wilson is from the Pocahontas area.

We passed a railroad underpass where we picnicked once, passed The Simple Room and finally Greenville College.  Being back on campus was at once wonderful and heartbreaking.  It’s like going home; this time, however, it was like going home when your room has been converted to a workout area by your parents.

Hogue Hall, the iconic building at the front of campus, the original college itself, was leveled.  Not even a brick remained.

We had heard that Hogue Hall was to be torn down because of structural integrity – or rather, the complete lack of any at all.  As it was told to us, just before it was condemned and scheduled to be demolished, a local woman (who was trying to get Hogue Hall declared a historic building, thus rescueing it from the wrecking ball) was interrogating my best friend’s uncle and one of the inspectors.  She simply couldn’t understand why the building couldn’t be saved.  As she was speaking, the inspector literally reached his hand into the wall, pulled a brick out of it and broke it in half with his hands!  Turns out, they structurally tested 600 bricks and none of them passed!  In fact, before they demo’d Hogue, they had to reinforce a wall near another building because it would have fallen on its own into that building.  There was no salvation possible.

A side note:  Hogue Hall was home to many of our classrooms and much of the faculty’s office space.  How nice to know it could have fallen in at any time.  Hmmm…

in god we trust?

MSNBC.com recently ran an article and online vote inquiring whether or not to keep the motto, “In God We Trust” on our national currency.  Michael Newdow, an athiest, has embroiled himself in a lawsuit to remove this motto because it carries overt religious overtones – because it prefers religion to non-religion.

You can imagine the stir this provokes in the “Christian” community.

Fury.  Outrage.  Disbelief.

Fear.

It is as if removing “In God We Trust” implies that our country, the United States of America, has abandoned its Christian and religious roots.  No wonder this provokes fear.

On the other hand, it seems to me that placing “God” on “Money” can too easily blur the distinction between the two.  It can lead us to delude ourselves, believing that God approves of our religious nationalism, that God somehow feels better about Himself because His name is splashed across Benjamin Franklin’s bust.  Rather than reminding us that we should put our trust in God (and not in financial security), the motto on the money slyly implies that God is quite okay with our reliance on something other than Him.

He stamps His approval on our consumerism.

His name validates our ambition.

Worse, it gives the false impression that ours is a “Christian” nation (as if writing something about God on money proves that we really seek to follow Jesus).

I have a better idea.  Instead of indignantly asserting that “this is one more step towards secularism”, let’s acknowledge that we Christians have often done a poor job of revealing who Jesus is in a way such that all can be drawn to Him (John 12:32).  Let’s decide to show our friends, community – even our nation – that we trust in God by what we do more than what words on paper read.

day six: omaha to columbia

Driving was uneventful today.  The real fun started when checking into our motel.

We attempted to find a La Quinta in Columbia, MO, because of their commitment to pet-friendliness, but aaa.com didn’t advertise one.  My mistake was thinking AAA was the end-all for hotels.

We reserved a room at the 2-star Best Western.

The first thing we noticed upon exiting was the La Quinta overlooking I-70.  The second thing we noticed was that our room wasn’t even in the main hallway.  At first, we actually passed it, went into the hallway and couldn’t understand why the rooms ended at 161.  We were in 163.  I actually did a triple take.  Even tried my key in 161.

No luck.

On our way out, we realized that “pet-friendly room 163” meant “large, isolated janitorial closet converted into guest room 163”.  Actually it wasn’t that bad.  And it is completely understandable that the pet rooms are located at the extreme end of the motel.  However, there was a break to rooming in a pet room:  TGI Friday’s was about 50 feet from our door.  No fast food dinner tonight!  I ate real vegetables and Niki had real fettuccine.

Lucky break.

hillbilly teeth

hillbilly teeth

My wife and I just came across a very serious health threat detailed by Good Housekeeping magazine.

Evidently, Funtastic Hillbilly Teeth (yes, there is such a thing other than the real thing), is being recalled for “excessive lead content in the gray paint on the teeth”.

Like I mentioned in a previous post, you can’t make this stuff up.

Just consider this as a Public Health Announcement.  Be more healthy, don’t wear hillbilly teeth.

day 5: sioux falls to omaha

Today we needed a break.  Not that our pets or child were giving us any problems.  They’re fantastic.

Seriously.

But we needed a break from the road.  But we still needed to keep moving.  Luckily, we found a pet-friendly hotel about 3-hours away in Omaha, Nebraska.  Yes, I know what you’re thinking:  the home of Omaha Steaks.

I have to be honest, I’ve never even briefly considered vacationing in Omaha.  But it was quite nice – mostly because we found both a Walmart and a Fazoli’s.

Ahh, Fazoli’s.  Crappy fast Italian that you eat because it’s good.  And the breadsticks:  you might harden and clog your arteries at the same time, but it sure seems worth it…mmmmm.

day four: sturgis to sioux falls

driving past the black hills of south dakota

Setting out from Sturgis (where I restrained myself from purchasing a Sturgis Bike Week T-shirt with a large, menacing leather-clad hog sitting atop a Harley Davidson, pointing at the viewer – I ride a Honda Shadow…just didn’t seem like it would fit), we passed by the edge of the Black Hills, which actually do seem darker than the other mountains around, oddly enough (and even though our pictures are terrible), on our way to Badlands National Park.

Before we arrived at the Badlands, we found ourselves at the historic Wall Drug.  Surprisingly enough, we had a blast, even though it is super-touristy.  It’s a huge place that started as a convenience store in the early-mid-1900’s.  However, no one was stopping even though they were right adjacent to the highway.  So, the wife of one of the owners decided to offer free ice water to passersby, and the rest is history.  They still offer free ice water and 5-cent coffee.

riding the wild and elusive jackalope

And, in case one hasn’t had the opportunity to come upon a real jackalope, Indian squaw or Mt. Rushmore, you can take pictures with these here, like we did.

The Badlands park was definitely worth the $15 entry fee.

We have wanted to visit the Badlands for years.  Stark, silent, barren and beautiful beyond words.  This is a holy place.  It is unfathomable to me to view the crags and cliffs, the jagged peaks and not give thanks to God for somehow causing all this to be.  It was jaw-dropping awe.  We live in His beautiful world.  It’s good to be His.

the savage native princess

posing with george

josh and niki in the badlands

little dude climbing the badlands

into the hurricane

Ok, it’s not technically a hurricane – in fact, Tropical Storm Fay’s sustained winds are only around 65mph, but it’s still putting a bit of a hold on our trip.  We should land in northern FL (right in Fay’s path, of course) late tonight, and we’ll know more as we get to my folks’ house.  We’re not too concerned other than getting to the Palm Beach area later than expected.

Welcome home…

day three: cody to sturgis

Outside our log cabin Carriage House

A slight miscalculation on day two led to an unrealistic expectation that we could pull a 13 or 14 hour drive (which would translate to a much longer day with an infant, two dogs and a cat).  In choosing Cody, WY, we assumed we could find a pet-friendly room at a 3-star hotel.

We didn’t count on the nightly rodeo.

Evidently (and to the pride of the good people of Cody, Wyoming), Cody is home to nightly rodeos all summer long.  As a result, rooms at the larger chain hotels and motels filled quickly.

We were recommended “Carriage House“.

The folks running the Carriage House were kind and helpful and they allowed our pets to stay inside.  And given that we froze ourselves the night before camping in Montana, any four walls and a bathroom would have done.

This simply did.

Little Dude scaling our lamp inside Carriage House.

But we still froze (this time, there was no way to shut off the constant rush of cold air from the two ceiling vents).  However, we had a comfortable bed, which was more than a step up from an uninflated air mattress.

Today would see us through more incredible landscape as we drove through Ten Sleep and Bighorn National Forest.  But before we got a chance to get there we attempted to wrestle breakfast out of McDonalds in Cody.

Unfortunately for us, they stopped serving breakfast before 10:48am. “We’ve moved on to lunch.” was all we got from the drive through speaker.  I was unimpressed.  Not only that, but they advertised free internet and as much as I tried, I could not connect without them asking for a prepaid internet card, whatever that is.  What the heck is a prepaid internet card?

So, our next stop with the KFC down the road.  After ordering lunch, we attempted to hear the amount we owed for our food.  What came out sounded like, “Ten diggy-dum-diggy-dum”.  Funny thing was that Niki and I both heard it the same way.  “Did she just say ‘ten diggy-dum-diggy-dum’?”

It didn’t stop there, either.  When we pulled to the drive-thru window and Niki asked a seemingly simply question:

“Do you know where a Starbucks is?”

- pause -

“I don’t even know what that is!”

What happened next surprised me.  My wonderfully sweet wife who very rarely utters a cross word to anyone, in her frozen-night-caffeine-deprived state of mind leans out the driver’s side window, both arms planted on the window, and asks incredulously, “Are you serious?“.

I laughed. Hard.  Several times.  Throughout the day.  That was funny.  This trip, other than our sleeping arrangements, rocks.  We’ve laughed way too much, but there was so much material to choose from to laugh at.  Good times…

Driving through Bighorn National Forest

Driving through Ten Sleep and Bighorn National Forest was eye candy.  The topography was so completely different from Yellowstone.  The crags and cliffs looked like they had been torn out by huge claws which dropped the chunks here and there along the river in the valley.  Incredible.

The signs along the road identified the various geological time periods of the rocks’ supposed creation:  Pennsylvanian, Cretacean, Precambrian.  This was a very old place.  And we raced through them in but a couple of hours.

Time travelers are we.

Further along in Bighorn

This was the most impressive view of the gorge we drove through. On the left, dolomites.

day two cont’d: Yellowstone

Day Two was near sensory overload.  Here’s a bit of the scenery we saw in our somewhat-hurried drive through the park.  Two hours in the park is enough to convince us to plan a trip here…

entering Yellowstone

just inside Yellowstone

Rusty & Charity kayaking through Yellowstone

Little Dude climbing Yellowstone

geysers on the way to Old Faithful

the earth looked like it was boiling all over the park

Old Faithful is HOT!

kayaking Lake Yellowstone...

bison roadblock near the east entrance

he wasn't real thrilled with me...he grunted and stuck out his tongue while our dogs barked

leaving Yellowstone was pretty unceremonious, given that we had forked over $25 to see it; we still had 50 miles to travel in the fading light to our "hotel"

Totally worth visiting twice.

day two continued…

breaking camp...

With Gillian safely in the car, we set out for Sturgis via Yellowstone.

We made it to Target.  This Target is the greatest Target we’ve experienced.

Happiness abounds.

The baby food was 20% more for the same price – Nathan’s happy;

There’s a Starbucks inside – Niki’s happy;

Momma’s happy – everyone’s happy.

Minus the freezing night, this day is starting to get good.  Seriously.  Niki has already rebounded from her nocturnal sleeplessness:  she counseled a woman in the bathroom who was concerned that her son was going to college in Alabama; she bought her 4th pair of sunglasses this year (Nik is singularly the unluckiest sunglasses owner in the known world.  She goes through several pair each year…it’s good she shops at Target).  And she came out with coffee and chai.

A good start indeed…

Well, no sooner did we leave Missoula than huge road signs reminded us of our historic surroundings.  Today was much more interesting than yesterday.  Instead of Historic Montana Valley Book Store, there were things much more important-sounding:

- Grant-Kohrs Ranch Historical Site (your guess is as good as mine)

- Old Montana Prison Museums (note the plural museums; do we really need to see more than one prison museum?)

- the incredibly explanatory, Historic Point near Beck Hill Rd.  Yes, I’m 100% serious:  Historic Point.  You can’t make this stuff up.

Speaking of not making things up, my new favorite sign ever is Rock City’s “World Famous Testicle Festival“.  I hesitate to write this, but the fact than anyone on God’s green earth can read this in 4-foot-high letters along Interstate 90 compels me to include this.  A testicle festival!  Of all things to celebrate… I would say, “only in Montana“, but I have to be honest:  I would be surprised if Arkansas did not have something similar.

You just can’t make this stuff up.

Nik & Josh in Gallatin National Forest

Further into Montana, we exited I-90, drove through Gallatin National Forest towards Yellowstone.  Rusty, Charity and Little Dude made their photo debuts as we drove through incredibly beautiful surroundings.  Horses, cabins and trails all over the place.  And only a few looked unabomber-ish.  Hey, it’s something you think of in these parts; comes from living near northern Idaho for a few years.